confession VI

and

sometimes

I block you because

I can’t bear to see you –

I can’t bear to see you smile

panoptic

you still see

everything

-

I find you in

the last page

of every book

lurking at

the bottom

of every box

hanging on to

the last notes

of every song

standing at

the end of

every road

-

you still are

everything

faulty first impression

I wish

you would

get over yourself;

you’re nowhere near

as fabulous as I first felt

after Christmas

after Christmas

I will forget

you

throw memories

out with the

tree

pack up pictures,

poinsettias,

pain

then crush them

carefully with

my feet

place these thoughts in

tissue-wrapped

trinkets

everything must go

lest I keep them

and weep

after Christmas

I will forget

you

rainy day memories

I remember

standing in doorways

watching water crashing

our silhouettes framed by light